Thursday, January 19, 2017

Weekly Weigh In 4: Abject Failure and My New Walking Buddy

     I won't lie to you guys, I really didn't want to write this post at all.  If you read last week's post you know two things.  One: I had the stomach flu, and two: I lost a shit ton of weight due to that flu.  I speculated that I would likely gain some of that weight back as I was fairly dehydrated.  Oh how right I was.

    Because I didn't just gain some of it back.  No. Being the overachiever that I am, I gained ALL of it back and then some.  Where is my gold star?! Ugh. I feel completely defeated.

    So what happened?  To be honest, I am not exactly sure.  I can assume a good portion of the weight was in fact due to re hydration.  The extra weight gained has left me puzzled.  I talked in my meeting about the potential reasons for the extra weight.  I realized that today I did two things outside my normal schedule for weigh in day.

     First I weighed in with different clothes.  Usually I opt for yoga pants and a tee shirt.  Today I am wearing jeans and a light sweater with a tank under it.  While I don't personally believe that the change in outfit should affect the scale so much, there were several women who have reached lifetime that INSISTED an outfit can make a big change.  (For those who don't know lifetime members are people in Weight Watchers that have reached and continue to maintain their goal weight)

     The second thing I did differently this morning was eat breakfast before weighing in.  Again something that other members have said has affected their weigh in results.  Especially if historically you have weighed in before eating (which usually I do).

     Finally, something I realized on my own while reflecting through my tracker is that this past week I have reverted back to some of my less healthy eating habits. Yes, I stayed within my daily and weekly point limits. But several days this week I skipped lunch and afternoon snack, instead having a very large dinner.  I don't know exactly how much that would affect a weigh in, as I did manage to stay on track points wise, but I feel that perhaps it's better to avoid doing that in the future.

     So where does this leave me?  Well almost starting completely over again.  It's frustrating for sure.  I kinda feel like the past two weeks' worth of work has been for nothing.  But I also recognize that the me before this probably would have used this set back as an excuse to quit.  I probably would have let the feelings of failure (shame?) to be an excuse to binge and the guilt of that binge to be the reason why I wouldn't weigh in again.  I'm not going to let myself do that this time around.  I recognize that this journey is going to be me changing my mindset as much as it's going to be me changing my diet and weight.  I can't let these set backs completely derail me from my goal.

     Which is why I am writing this week's post despite all the voices in my head yelling at me to stop and find solace in the cookie dough.

     OK, enough of the pity party. Let's talk about what I was able to accomplish this week.  I am happy to report that I was able to get out for two small walks this week.  Which I know isn't the three that I had originally hoped for, but it is better than the zero I had accomplished before.  So I am calling that a win.  And I have this little guy to thank for the motivation:

     This is our new puppy, Loki.  Loki is a Great Pyrenees, and right now he's about 10 weeks old. He absolutely loves going for walks so whenever the weather clears (recently it's been raining and/or icy) I take him for a little stroll around the block when I need to take him outside.  So far walking on the treadmill has been a bit of a challenge as this little fuzz butt gets a little too excited with the moving bits and attacks it.  I'm hoping that eventually he will get used to it, or I'll have to put him in the crate while I walk.

     That's all I have to report for this week!  Thank you for all the messages of support I have received!  It really does help me stay motivated and on task!  I will see you next week!


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